Vivid dreams last night - and more dreams of skyscrapers. It's a recurrent theme - for me, I'm not sure why. Always very tall, square, sheer sides. The whole thing is always quite "vertiginous". Lifts seem to play a constant role, and though the building never changes shape or narrows, the feeling of claustrophobia in the lift, as it reaches the summit, tends to increase. I think last night's dream featured a number of lifts: a main, large lift to a few floors before the top, and then having to switch to a smaller lift, for those final floors.
What it all means, I have no idea. I'm loathe to try and tie it to the current brexit brinkmanship, as it's a theme in my dreams that I've had for absolutely ages.
And - oddly, I dreamt of substances, too. Drugs that had no effect. Perhaps this is informed by my realisation (over the whole sobriety issue) that so much of that behaviour is essentially ritualistic.
Ah, that's quite enough soul-searching for now. Time to do the school run.
One of the advantages of Google+ vanishing into the ether, is that - here on this little blog - I'm reverting to a Blogger profile. There's something rather comforting about that, I must admit,
I'm sitting in bed, at the moment, musing on the indicative votes for the Brexit process (huge, huge sigh) and wondering whether to read a little more of the Murakami.
I've also been thinking, in a scattershot way, about lots of things from my past. Oddly, about when I sued to smoke. Coming back from Manchester, in a white 205 GT, doing 90mph down the M6. Stopping at the services, for snacks, and to sit in the hot sun. A full ashtray in the car. Rather shamefully, probably throwing the odd butt out of the window.
How did I do all of this? How did I not notice how bad the car smelled? Or how my clothes stank? All of my mistakes (for that's how they seem to me now) are a part of me, but it's strange trying to reconcile them with how I am now.
....But certainly not the deepest. The lawn has been trimmed, for the first time this year. So, the mower is at its highest setting, as the grass is just still so deep, and lush. Plus, it's tricky to get it entirely dry, at this time of year -but obviously, you do need to finally cut it. So, it's a bit of a balancing act. It's a suburban ballet - everyone seems to be looking over each others fences, waiting to see who makes the first move - and then, there's just this weekend where all of us seem to head for the shed, simultaneously.
But, it feels good, that's for certain. The garden looks tidy, for the first time in months, emerging from a really tough winter. Over the next few months, I'd love to do a lot out there - but there's gigs on the horizon. Let's see how it all pans out.
Pip is off on the March, today -so I've got the kids. Except they're all over the place too, with Marnie off at a birthday party, then straight off to Gym. Milo and me will spend at least a couple of hours in the car, zooming around the county, as we pick up, and drop off.
So, the time in between will be spent relaxing, I think.There's not much space to stretch it out into proper plans. I've done the shopping, I've got the meals planned out.... it's all in place.
New Murakami book turns up later, so when it does, I'll get stuck in.
Sometimes, that's all I want to do. I'm actually getting better at typing now, so I can try and get everything out there, in real time. Previously, there always felt like there might have been some sort of disconnect. So, now I can let it flow, a little. Which feels good, and it's a little bit of a kick to the pants: a way of stimulating my thoughts, and laying them down on the page.
Today has been....OK, I guess. Some achievement, some forward progress. I'm a terrible procrastinator, so grinding the gears is a good thing.
More work on the new car issue (almost sorted - at least, decisions seem to be being made) and a lot of logistical focus on some upcoming shows. That includes, one in the US. First time for me, since a couple of months before 9/11. Time passes quickly, doesn't it?
And I finished the Murakami. I can't quite recall a time when a book moved me as much, and stayed in my mind. A long, slow, exhale. I'm buying another.
Regular readers to this blog will know, that every once in a while, a new obsession arises. I tend to throw myself into something, headlong, and stay there. I did it with Pink Floyd, a few years ago, and more recently - Miles Davis.
Well, the new obsession appears to be a minor offshoot of the Miles stuff.
It's "Sketches Of Spain".
For a long time, I've not really "got" Sketches - certainly, not to the same extent as other Miles albums. "Bitches Brew" has been a constant companion for the last few years - I'm not kidding when I say I think I've listened to "Pharaoh's Dance" pretty much every day. For me, it's become meditative, an exercise in mindfulness. It keeps me sane, inspired, full of optimism, and hope.
But Sketches was different - I never really appreciated it. Partly, I think, for the geographical specificity. To me, it felt like a Travelogue, or a tourist advert. How wrong I was. There's something about the album that's just.....grabbed me. Partly, this is down to my recent jaunt to Edinburgh - I sat on that plane, and made a conscious decision to zone out, and listen to an album, any album, in full. Preferably something I'd not listened to properly before. And there you have it - I just looked at Sketches in the Spotify menu, and thought "why not?"
It is an absolute masterpiece. It's transcendentally beautiful - almost spiritual in its power. There are moments which are genuinely transformative. This being one of them, Miles's solo, around two thirds of the way through, which rises, and then collapses on itself, in a series of jaw-dropping descending, mournful blasts on the horn - is one of the most astonishing things I've ever heard.
- So, It's been three days now, and I've listened to nothing else. I'll keep you all posted, but I suspect this will continue for quite some time.
Well, I'm back from Edinburgh. Had a fantastic time - managed to pack a lot in, over the course of just one day. Left early Saturday, got back home about 6pm on Sunday. Relatively pain-free flights, which is always a bonus; though the take-off from Heathrow was a little hairy. I think it was the remnants of storm Gareth, but we were fishtailing down the runway on take-off, as the winds were so strong, and there was plenty of low-level turbulence too. One we were above the clouds, all was nice and serene. Great to see Jason (Narducey - bass player for Bob Mould), he's been a mate for 30 years.
Having a drink, post-show. Hotel bar, the Radisson Collection, Edinburgh
Flights there and back were on BA Airbuses. 321's, and 320's.
Always forget how different the weather can be - there was snow on the Pentland Hills.
Overall, it was a great trip. Best thing, for me, about solo travelling, is the chance to decompress: to organise mind, body, thoughts. To lose yourself in the process. that was my objective, and I think I got there.
This has been a trying time, for the band. We launched two albums last year, via Pledge Music, but the platform is now imploding. We've not been paid, and others are owed sums far greater than us. It's all led to a slew of articles, and podcasts, and interviews, for me. I've not especially loved the attention - I'd much rather have had the funds, and been able to pay my bills! But, if it's a battle they want, then it's a battle they shall have, I'm nothing if not tenacious.
More details - the latest tweets, etc - are here:
It's Wreaked Havoc
I'm off to Edinburgh in the morning - and I'm unfeasibly excited about it all. I just love solo travelling, the calm, and the focus that it brings me. I love everything about it - the airports, the queueing, the hanging around. Watching the world go by, out of the window of a plane.
Can't wait.
Today has been a little fragmented - went looking at new cars, which is always a bit of a buzz. Milo's got a play date, so I've finished cooking for kids, and we're next.
Well, seeing as I mentioned it in the last post - here's the Dopp Kit, all ready to go at the weekend.
I do see a lot of posts on all those "lifestyle and travel blogs", where people blog about their perfect travel experiences, and everything seems so shiny, and new. My Dopp kit is slightly more real, I guess.
It's a L'Occitane washbag (a bit tatty now). Bought in Portland, on a family holiday, back in 2015. Transparent, so good for TSA/Security, etc. There's an eye mask (from my last Air Canada flight, home from Calgary) and a spare cloth for cleaning my glasses. A travel toothbrush, and toothpaste. I'd like to use bamboo toothbrushes in the future (as I do at home) but that brush hasn't worn out, as yet. When it does, I'll replace it for something more sustainable. Tins have deodorant (Body Shop Aromoco) and solid shampoo and conditioner. I break fragments off larger blocks, for short journeys. The silver tin at the front has some BLack & White hair wax (lasts forever) and the small atomiser contains my Cologne. Somehwat pretentiously, but also rather sustainably - it's a discontinued fragrance, I have to get from eBay - Crabtree & Evelyn Cologne. The pot of vitamins is actually Centrum Mens 50+ (oh, the glamour - but they work, for me). there's only a few in there, which means there's room for some Melatonin, and a couple of sets of earplugs. Plus, the mini cologne bottle sits in there too, nice and safe.
So, overall, I'm happy with it. It's beaten up, it's not flashy, and it doesn't show that well, but it just WORKS, and that's the main thing, for me.
Just sat and read a dozen pages of Murakami, which really calmed me down. I feel much more contemplative, when I've been reading, no matter what specific subject. And I'm looking out of the office window at a post-storm sky: bright, deep blue, solid and reassuring.
I'm also starting to look forward to my Edinburgh trip on Saturday. I get to fly, ac couple of times, I can stay in a nice hotel, meet friends, and think. I have a bag ready to go, with as little as I can take. A bare minimum of clothes, a book, and a dopp kit I've had sitting in the wardrobe for a while. I'm fascinated by effective dopp kits - keeping things tidy, efficient. I've got little slivers of soaps and deodorant in tins, hair wax in a small container, tiny pots with ear plugs and melatonin. there's a single razor, and shave oil, so as not to take up too much room. the entire thing is a finely honed machine.
It's blowy, squally, and downright horrid out there. Marnie has her bikeability lesson today, which the school are adamant will NOT be changed, bad weather or not. Sheesh.
I've had a haircut (holiday trim - in time for Edinburgh!) and am not settling down to do some admin.
I'm also listening to a lot of tunes that Hall Blaine played on, as he's just passed away. RIP, to one of the greatest - if not THE greatest, ever. I could listen to him, all day long. This clip really sums up why: the song isn't really that remarkable, at all, but it's Blaine's beautifully poised, swinging beats, that lift it into the realm of sheer magic.
Well, it's been a long day - but relatively stress-free. The party passed off well, Marnie did her swimming, the house is tidy, the fire is on. School shoes cleaned, school bags packed. Breakfast things on the table, ready for the morning.
And me? Well, I'm using the above materials, to make myself of bowl of something. That's hajinomoto, in the glass jar. So, rice, egg, Japanese soy sauce, and seasoning. No prizes for guessing what that makes......
Sitting in the playroom, looking out at a very wet garden (torrential rain last night) and checking news stories for tomorrow's bulletin. I really need to see if I can get it out of the way today, as tomorrow is always crazy. First day of the week, kids back to school (bags, clothes, shoes - all dispersed around the house) trying to get out of the house first thing in the morning is stressful enough without having to find another half hour to do the news. Plus, the cleaner turns up in the middle of all that chaos, and is liable to switch the hoover on.
So, I need to look at the NME Music news page, and parse some content. It's quite amazing how ALL of it seems to be about Michael Jackson, and R.Kelly. I did a bulletin - Friday, I think, where it was just sex abuse allegation stories, for three minutes. Ugh.
And, to top it all off, Milo's rescheduled birthday bash is this afternoon. Not quite a full party, just mates coming over for Pizza and cake - but the house will be a war zone for a few hours.
So, there'a trip to the supermarket that needs to be done, a kids party, a couple of meals to make....it seems so quiet, right now. I suspect that I'll look back and wonder what the hell went on, when I post later.
I know I've said it a couple of times before, but I'm reading again - and actively trying to increase the amount I read. That, more blogging, writing diary entries when I'm away (as in next weekend in Edinburgh). It's all an attempt to be less....transient, I suppose.
So, I'm reading Norwegian Wood by Murakami, again. I've given it a go before - and got a third of the way through, but drifted off. So, it's back to the start, with a fresh sense of purpose, after a year or two. I was like this wit the Wind Up Bird Chronicle too, and loved that second time around. I think there's an odd thing with Murakami, where your head has to be in the right space. You have to open your eyes - but also, your mind - and there seems to be no way of forcing that. Once you're ready - then you're ready.
Looks like I am.
